Hi to whomever,

I don't think anyone reads these but I gotta say it anyway.
I'm sick to death of being terrorized and abused.
If someone hits you and calls you ethnic slurrs does it matter who it is that does it?
Last week I was hit repeatedly until a large bruise was on my arm that lasted for two weeks. It went from black to yellow healing.

The other day I was hit in the head on the temple FIVE times with a cell phone while a passenger in a car.
Why? because I begged the driveer not to drive into another cars lane and kill us. The driver was talking on the cell phone and swerving all over a four lane highway. The man we almost hit saw me scream and try to shield myself. He had a look of horror on his face but thats all I saw I was trying to shield myself with my arms.
The person hitting me called me a string of racial slurrs.
My head hurt so bad I had to medication and stay in bed for two days.

Tonight I was called another string of slurs and the abuser picked up a weighted book end and had me cowering on the floor. Then spit all over my clothing I had hanging up for school tomorrow. I had to wash it by hand and it took a great deal of time. I had to rewash everything spit on.

I'm tired beyond imagination. I'm sick and I'm frightened more than you can even imagine.
I'm an adult. But I really don't have many options and I can't leave.

I'd like to do something about this but I have no idea what to do.
When I tried to tell some aquaintences they blew it off.

If it were a man hitting me they would have told me to leave.

It isn't. It's my own sister who is several inches taller and she outweighs me by at least 65 or 70 pounds.

WHY THE HELL IS IT THAT IF A MAN HITS YOU THEN OMFG CALL THE COPS
BUT IF YOUR SIBLING HITS YOU THEN. " thats just what siblings do."

My "sister" has threatened to terrorize my school life and online accounts. She is offering stuff people to come after me.

She claims to be a christian at our GOD Fearing Xtian school.

I don't deserve to be called the "N" word. The Filthy Nword Bword.
I'm not black she just hates me because my skin is darker than hers.

This goes beyond sibling fights this is real abuse.

I said I am a prisoner here.
She says she is a "prisoner of christ"
That makes me sick!

I'm scared to death.

I know my journal usually has something sad or horrible in it but my life isn't the sunshine that xtain school claims to be.

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